Philanthropy is a very good thing. I have noticed that people are very generous nowadays. Maybe the PQ (philanthropic quotient )has increased in India.
You don’t believe me right? Well I will give you plenty of examples.
We had a really big rat coming into our house everyday (how nice of Mr. rat to give those daily visits) and he used to taste everything in our house (like the tomatoes lying in the kitchen) and that’s not all he also used to leave us a present behind (those lovely enigmatic shape things which is the end product of food intake and lots of exercise-still didn’t get it then personally mail me for the answer) on the kitchen platform everyday. My philanthropic friend decided to give him a nice surprise and one fine evening when the rat was fearlessly roaming in the house he gave him a friendly smack with the broom and the rat instantly went to heaven for the reincarnation process (that was so nice of my friend to finally end the life of the rat – he might be reincarnated as human again). There is the sign of a selfless act wherein you don’t think about your own but help others as much as you can.
Then we have a lovely dog living in the basement of our building (he is so cute that you can actually see the ulcer he has under his tongue when he barks at you – don’t worry he is not rabied. He has bitten lots of people and nobody has died). I decided to give him some present one day and when it was standing down the stairs I jumped on him to give him a pleasant surprise (research has proved that startling someone can cause the blood pressure to rise and thereby increasing the blood flow through the vessels thereby increasing the energy and oxygen in the body). He has never forgotten me since then and whenever I meet him he shows me all his teeth and barks incessantly at me till I run away (how sweet of him)
But wait a minute what does the topic heading have to do with all this?
Oh I forgot. I wanted to discuss about the selfless activity that people pursue on the streets and in the gardens. Now who is going to tell me what it is that I am talking about. Anyone anyone? No one? Yes people I am talking about the water harvesting system that god has provided to us and which the Indians use liberally all over(unfortunately this good deed is done only by the male species in public). Hey don’t feel shy talking about it. Do they feel shy doing it in the public? No then it becomes our moral duty to applaud them in public and felicitate them in return for the exceptional selflessness feat that they perform day in and day out.
When asked these perpetrators of pissing on the roadside what impelled them to be so generous and increase the water table at the cost of their humiliation, they promptly replied (albeit pretty modestly) that this altruistic venture is a result of either their increased metabolism or they did it under enormous pressure (literally speaking) and since they had to face this situation everyday they have made it a habit to oblige the citizens of India to showcase their talent (no wonder the road side walls are so neat and clean).
Did anybody thank them for the increase in the olfactory delight that they provide in the process (I simply love that odor). That is really bad of you people, cant you atleast acknowledge their good gesture. Cant you see the environment enhancing effect of their exploits? Its because of them that the road side dry areas are capable of supporting green plants and trees. Not to mention the increase of water in the depleted water table due to their penchant for philanthropy. The bloody government tried to discourage them by building public toilets in crowded places but they stuck to their task and didn’t dodge from their goal(I salute to the valiant untiring efforts of these national heroes).
Maybe India is a poor country but the hearts of people living here is huge. They contribute to the already piling filth by spitting on the streets, throwing all their mess in the house on the streets, giving loud lovely expletives when in traffic, giving knives in stomach on smallest of fights (I am sure it helps in reducing weight) and god knows how many more altruistic deeds.
That plant by my building wall was never so green even though I don’t water it. Thank you guys on behalf of all the dirty and selfish people who pursue the pissing activity inside toilets and never think out of their shells.
My dog and small kids are also philanthropic. I need to learn something from them.
I have to go the sweet odor is calling me again.
“the more you cry the less you have to pee”
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