Gender bender - battle of the sexes

Doesn't the topic sound somewhat weird and abstract (i usually think up the topics when i am in the loo or in a stupor in the office). Yes my friend it is exactly that. Weird, funny (if i were serious then i n would be in ICU), dramatic and somewhat path breaking.

So i believe that i always keep you people stranded wondering what the contents of the blog are going to be. This time around the topic revolves around what men love and hate the most. Yes it could be going out to a party and visiting your mother-in-law (not necessarily in the same order if your boss is also coming to the party and your mother　in law is beautiful) but unfortunately the answer is only one so its the wrong answer. The right answer is one of God's most amazing creation which is not completely understood by god too (the 'too' is for the men). Yes and no prizes for guessing but its wo(o)men.
Women=the topic of discussion when more than 0 men get together.
Women=the proud owner of a wardrobe filled with so many clothes that it directly contributes to the Indian GDP.
Women=who makes the sabzi wala shudder with dread at the thought of bargaining with her.
Women=the pain and panacea for all the men.
Women is one definition which i never had to by heart as i am now practically conversant with the subject along with all the derivations and equations.

But hold on for all the men who are rubbing their hands in glee, i am with the women and not with the men this time. Why??
Once Henry Kissinger said that the battle of sexes can never be won by either of the groups because there is too much fraternizing with the enemy and you can gladly call me the vidur of Ramayana.
For the girls, don't thank me i am just giving you what is your due (and trying something different than lamenting females every time).

So for starters here's a quote
"the perfect man, flirts not, smokes not, drinks not, exists not". Hey it’s true. For once in my life i want to be completely truthful and honest and tell you people what guys think.
Whenever a beautiful lady passes our way (i call them ladies keeping in mind the crowd reading this article-my friend calls them something else) we usually stare at her dumbfounded and not even giving a thought to what if that lady notices us and she has a boyfriend who is a gym instructor, then which cemetery should we be buried in. But here i would like to praise the spirits of the darker sex cause if by chance the lady is present with the boyfriend then we don’t get demoralized but utter the epitome of optimistic lines like "he must be her brother (then how come the girl is so fair and the guy so dark)" or "they are just friends (that’s what i call undying spirit)"

There is a joke on the men "what is the difference between men and pig-pigs don’t turn into men when they drink"

Okay so maybe i am being too harsh on the males and i am sure that some of them are already waiting for me with baseball bats to beat me (if something happens to me then all the males who read my blog are responsible) but its because i believe that men have got some unfair advantage on women. Take the example of the office itself.
When a woman works in a traditionally male field ...She must be twice as knowledgeable, twice as proficient, twice as accurate, and twice as humble as any man to be considered half as good at the job! And that’s not true vice-versa. Take the example of cooking. Most the restaurants will have male chefs as preferred to female.
Exaggeration is integral to me but some of this stuff is really true. Men are physically well built than women and intellectually too (i challenge somebody to say that there are more female scientists than male scientists). So God gave women some powers like emotional superiority, ability to take care of children in the house (the difference between women and men is that women love their children. They know everything about them, including birthdays, allergies, likes and dislikes. Men are vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.) and greater debating qualities. It is said that there are two theories to arguing with women - and neither of them works.
I know that now the blog is getting increasingly long so i will be concluding it.
But i just want to express something to the male species listening to me. Its called unsolicited advice and here it is. It is men's duty to take care of the women around. Maybe its too old fashioned but courtesies like not letting the lady pay the bill when she is with you, or pulling a chair when she is coming to the table should never become obsolete. A gentleman is not a gentleman if he doesn't respect women.


Ending with a poem by an unknown person
Sometimes we must be hurt in order to grow,
sometimes we must fail in order to know,
Sometimes we must lose in order to gain,
because some lessons in life are best learned through pain...
Face the truth, it has no Bias